Early Easter morning, four and a half years ago, life for our family changed forever. I awoke to the sound of an otherworldly noise and Tina’s body convulsing uncontrollably. That event began us onto a path where we would discover that Tina was suffering from late onset Epilepsy. That path would include long periods of Tina being home-bound and a non-stop roller-coaster of trying to figure out which medications would strike the best balance between controlling her seizures but also limit the debilitating side-effects of chronic fatigue and loss of focus – that effort has only been marginally successful.

On July 14th 2010, our path took another turn when Tina underwent a five week long surgical procedure where doctors at University Hospitals in Cleveland Ohio implanted multiple electrodes into her brain in the hope that this would allow them to locate the spot in her brain that is responsible for her seizures and then surgically remove that spot in an attempt to control her seizures without medication. Unfortunately after 3 surgical attempts to locating this seizure focus, the clock ran out and the risk of continuing this procedure became too great, so they removed all of the electrodes, and sent her home with very little to show for our 5 weeks in the hospital.

When we left Cleveland two summers ago we couldn't imagine that we would go back anytime soon. Those five weeks in the hospital were very disappointing for Tina and difficult for our kids. However, over the course of the last year and a half, Tina's seizures have become progressively more frequent, and medications have become progressively less effective at controlling her seizures. So, after consulting with Tina's neurologists, it is clear that we are in for yet another turn in the path of life.

We will once again be making the trip to University Hospitals in Cleveland, and on Wednesday January 11th, Tina will once again undergo the same procedure to implant electrodes in her brain to monitor seizure activity in the hope that they can determine the physical location of her seizures and surgically remove it.

This is not a path that we went looking for nor did we anticipate how sharply our lives would change literally over night when four and a half years ago these seizures began. There have been days when we have wondered as to why these things were happening and what God was up to in this. What we have learned is best summed up by the Apostle Paul in his letter to the church at Rome where he said that the paths that God lays out for us are "beyond tracing out." We may not understand this path or where it’s leading us, but what we do know is that we would rather follow God’s untraceable path than to follow any path we could lay out for ourselves. This blog is our attempt to bring others along with us as we walk along God’s untraceable path.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Headed Out

We're headed out in a couple of hours. The kids just left for Grayling and are excited to spend the week with cousins. We had a good long talk with them last night and as you can imagine they have many fears and anxieties about what might happen. In the end we all know that we are in God's hands and that no matter what happens we confess that God is good, He is in control, and he is loving - and even if this thing turns south none of that changes.

We were reminded again yesterday with our close friends who discovered that their new baby girl has a tumor on her brain, that often times life takes turns we don't expect and would not take if we could choose. Once again I think of what Paul says in Romans 11- God's paths for us are untraceable.

Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out!
"Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?"
"Who has ever given to God, that God should repay him?"
For from him and through him and to him are all things.
To him be the glory forever! Amen.
- Romans 11: 33-36

We cannot see where this path is taking us nor did we choose this path, but what we have chosen is to follow our King no matter what and so if this is the untraceable path he has for us we will gladly follow it even when it takes a bend in the road and disappears into the woods where we cannot see what is up ahead. However we take hope in the fact that we know the one who made this path and the "the depth of the riches of [his] wisdom and knowledge" are unspeakable, and so we will follow this path with an open heart. We recognize that from Him are all things and that through Him do all things exist and pray that in all things we would live our lives TO Him. "To him be the GLORY forever!
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8 comments:

Anonymous said...
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July 12, 2010 at 8:26 PM
Anonymous said...

Will be praying for you both.

July 12, 2010 at 8:28 PM
truspartan said...

Praying for you guys!

July 12, 2010 at 10:19 PM
Anonymous said...

our dear children! we too, declare that God is good and in His mercy He understands when our hearts fail and our minds go to areas of uncertainty. How we love you!

July 12, 2010 at 10:34 PM
Unknown said...

This is beautifully written. Your perspective is an inspiration and your willingness to share your journey is surely God-led. Godspeed and I will be praying for healing and blessings while you are in Ohio.

July 13, 2010 at 1:07 PM
Unknown said...

Though we don't know you personally, we know you as brothers and sisters in Christ. We stand with you and our prayers are for you. Blessings! Quinn & Lisa Seaman

July 13, 2010 at 2:51 PM
Charle4 said...

You are in our prayers!

July 13, 2010 at 7:59 PM
julie said...

Praying for your physical, emotional, and spiritual GPS to stay plugged in throughout this journey. May you sense God's peace.
Kevin & Julie

July 14, 2010 at 12:11 AM

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